25th April Crook Town (h)

Goodbye faithful season tickets!

The final game of the season had arrived and it was with a mixed sense of relief and anti-climax that The Boy Mark and I headed for Hillheads. The end of last season had seen as narrowly pipped for the League Cup in extra time against Marske and with a positive pre-season a good season looked on the cards: we'll not mention the 0-10 St Mirren game which I missed because I was on holiday (so it didn't happen). However a swift exit from the FA Cup and only one win in the first seven league and cup games saw the Bay drop to 16th. after that the lads recovered enough to rise to 6th but unavailability and injuries took hold and a run of good results ended with defeat in the Vase at home to Dunston for the second season running. Leon left because of family and work commitments and the team found it hard to get a win. Paddy arrived with thousands, slight exaggeration there, of new players but it still took time for them to gel. With improved performances if not results, the season was drawing to a close with the Bay in 14th playing the bottom team in the league, Crook, who had the unenviable record of having conceded 177 goals with a goal difference of -138. Surely we would finish the season off in style?
My first bit of excitement came from the Jarrow Roofing Twitterer who told me that their lack of roofing was not "Health and Safety madness" but rather an exciting development of new roofing for next season! Overjoyed that someone had actually bothered to read my blog and comment on it, the news about new Jarrow roofing helped me float to the ground. Must have a friendly there please fixtures secretary! That would be ace!

The programme itself featured the bearded wonder Craig McFarlane, who is still recovering from the tackle that broke his ankle at WA Celtic. His absence was another reason we had struggled to turn good performances into wins. Fingers crossed for his recovery and that he remains with the Bay. The talk before the game amongst our group was who would we love to return the following year and without exception Robbie Birdie Bird was top of everyone's list, Blandford was another popular choice along with Craig Mc.
The team had definitely been playing better recently so there weren't many that anyone wanted to see go. The area that did need to improved on was the attacking side of the team with Watling producing some great performances but lacking support and consistency at times.
Barely three minutes, however, Bird crossed and Watling scored: just to show us how much we needed the 28-goal man. Then, by the 18th minute Robbie B had shown how important he was to the Bay when he first drove low past the keeper then followed that up with a mazy run and drive into the same corner. As if to rub it in our good friend Chris the Owls fan, decided it would be a good idea to remind the visitors of their current goal difference so "-140" was duly shouted out. I am afraid the giddy excitement of being 3-0 up got to me. We also decided it was a good idea to copy our favourite youtube video of fans copying the linesman but you really need more than two of you doing it...

Just before half time, Watling added his second to round  off an excellent first half performance that was great to see. Also good to see was the return of the green goalie top which was just as well because The Boy Mark (TBM) was a tad upset that I had promised his financial involvement to my 'Buy the Bay Keeper' a new top scheme without consulting either him or more importantly his wife (or mine for that matter). Somebody needs to hide the old jersey....as well as get the team new strips!
Into the second half and when Watling shielded the ball in so heroic a manner that not even a combine harvester could have knocked him over, the ball ended up at Kempster's feet who managed to control and score. The impressive substitute Stanger then blazed over and first Watling was denied his hat-trick when a push by him was punished with a freekick and disallowed goal, then Robbie dribbled his way through the defence, beat the keeper but his weak shot was cleared off the line.
The final score of 5-0 didn't flatter the Bay but you had to feel sorry for Crook who go back down to the second division after an extremely hard season. The crowd for the final game of the season was a disappointing 262, in spite the offer that promised under 16s went free with a fee-paying adult.
Next season I would love to be cheering on Robbie, Craig, Alex and co to bigger and better things. The main objective is to keep these better players at the club and get new strips, obviously but whatever happens rest assured that come what may, TBM and I will be there with our new season tickets to cheer the lads on. #HTB and enjoy the summer.

The players take their final applause of the season: see you in July!

Finally: Good luck Glen Martin, the Bay's silver-headed physio. Enjoy your retirement!

18th April - Jarrow Roofing (a)

All my excited on the drive to the game was about how Jarrow Roofing had so many roofs around their ground. This was based on my previous visit a few years ago when I had dragged the family out for their traditional Bank Holiday visit to watch the Bay. The Boy Mark's excitement knew no bounds as he entered the famous home of Roofs!

Wot no roofs?

Imagine our disappointment as we looked around us to find that the number of covered sections had been drastically reduced: probably due to ludicrous health and safety guidelines. It was like meeting an old girlfriend (who you had only been out with once) and finding out she wasn't quite as good looking as you had imagined as she had chopped off all her beautiful flowing locks to be replaced by a crew cut! It was hard to hold back the tears...but I managed it, just. Health and safety had deprived us both! At least the Haway the Roofers sign was still there!

Nice seats....

In the absence of the roof, though there was the bonus of a spot to put the match programme on. One of the posts that had held up the old roof made an extremely useful table for what was an extremely interesting programme. Normally I only buy a programme to get the team news and try to work out who is who on the pitch but the Jarrow programme was a really good read. It was on shiny paper and there were notes from the manager, assistant, captain and a supporter. Each one seemed to have different memories and experiences to relate, something rare to find in these days of rent-a-quotes. There was also a good article on the Chow-ster, now a Jarrow player which told about how he had ended up signing for the Bay. A top read and surprising that it was only runner-up to West Allotment Celtic for Northern League programme of the year: a programme that I had missed out on after arriving late at the WAC away game a few weeks earlier. Probably Barry had bought them all for the alternative dimension that is his programme shop. These two clubs should be an inspiration for the rest of the Northern League and make other teams realise that writing a programme isn't something that just gets dumped on one hard-working person, it is a club effort from the manager, sponsors to the supporters: their supporter claimed he was on the roof (is £6 really too much to pay? A good programme is something that can be used to promote the club and its sponsors if used in the right way....nobody wants to read the same old thing every week! This certainly was a good read. Well done, Jarrow!

All alone but Robbie is back!

Tearing myself away from the programme it was good to see the lads with smiles on their faces. Maybe Paddy is a bit of a misery on the touchline but his assistants seemed to be encouraging the one-touch games with positivity as well as a good amount of banter during them. In the far corner, Robbie B was doing some stretching with the physio, or was he playing "Row, row your boat?". But the good news was that he was dressed and ready to play....one less to worry about and great to see him back.

The first half was an exciting affair as both teams threatened and it was also good to see Watling putting himself about, getting on the end of forward passes and using his frame to protect the ball much better than he had been doing. Cavey, was having a storming game and seemed to be involved in everything. Blandford managed a cracking shot too so it was a shock to see Jarrow score first. The Jarrow striker Dan Kirkup found himself with only Sean McC to beat, which he did confidently. But the Bay didn't give up and stormed back; and what a goal it was. Watling found himself on the edge of the penalty area and he curled the ball into the top corner. There was a brief pause as we watched the ball loop in but it was a delightful strike from a rejuvenated Watling: all of 20yards according to the club's Twitter.

Neither keeper nor fans can bear
 to look at that shirt!

The only down point from the first half was the return of that horrible grey goalkeeping jersey. The Boy Mark and I have decided we will buy the club a new jersey if it will mean the retirement of that awful shirt. As the teams left the field it was clear that McCafferty couldn't bear to look at it...and neither could the crowd...get rid of it! While you are at it, Mr Chairman please give us some shirts to be proud of...ditch the Wembley ones please, you could even sell some at the club shop!

Yet more excitement followed as we visited Jan's Tea Hut. Although I was disappointed with the missing apostrophe on Jan's, we weren't disappointed with the chips, mine with curry sauce, which were extremely crispy and very welcome. Although if The Boy Mark's wife is reading he had no chips at all....

The second half was noticeable for the amount of arguing with the ref from both sides as he struggled to keep hold of a very physical game but the Bay dominated and could easily have scored the winner on a number of occasions. Fierce Roofing defending kept the visitors out. At the end we were disappointed to come away with only a draw but Jarrow deserved something for the determination they had shown throughout. 

The sun was still shining as we left the ground and apart from the missing roofing and the grey jersey it had been an extremely pleasant afternoon.

8th April 2015 - North Shields (a)

Joined by Silly Andrew.

In September 1996 I moved to teach in a new school and on the same pitch I paid £6 to stand on today, I had managed my school's football team to a 1-0 victory. Still at the same school 19 years later it was bizarre to be watching the Bay play there. Also bizarre was the fact that the pitch had a fence, stands, bar, changing facilities and the rest. Also bizarre was that this was the home of FA Vase finalists: an amazing achievement considering the progress Shields have made over the last few years. But it was a painful one to see the local rivals doing so well in our season of uncertainty. After a visit to the local social club we arrived to see an even longer queue snaking out of the car park than there had been at Hillheads. What was noticeable was the lack of Whitley scarves around the ground as well as the abundance of shiny new Shields scarves. We did get to meet up with occasional Whitley visitor Silly Andrew...who is silly, amazingly, and called Andrew. He was enjoying a snack obtained from the Shields Club Cafe: a delightful Pot Noodle that would have sent shivers down Tommy's spine: classy stuff but where was the Bovril?!

I'll have.......

Compared to our last confrontation against Shields, there seemed to be more about the Bay and Robbie 'the dad' Bird was looking lively. When Robbie was put through on goal he found himself being pulled all over the place before being dragged down to the ground. No penalty decided our favourite white-haired referee! Worse was to follow as Robbie limped off soon after in a great deal of pain. First Craig Mc out now Robbie...our pacy options were becoming severely limited. 'Chuck' Norris came on for Robbie but found life difficult against the Shields defence.
It was at this point the Shields' Confectionery Trolley trundled past us...an blatant but welcome piece of Shields consumerism! Unfortunately as I finished purchasing my prawn cocktail crisps, Shields took the lead. A scrappy goal by all accounts so I was glad I missed it. Another Bay penalty appeal went by the way of the Silver-haired one (as if he'd give us one) then as I made some notes on the match Shields were 2-0 up. Another goal missed: apparently this one was a defensive slip leaving Shields goal-machine Bainbridge the job of scoring a well-taken second.

We deserved better! This end of the ground was not so full.

In the first half, Whitley had passed the ball about confidently but failed to make much of an inroad into the Shields penalty area and Shields had scored twice with little more than two shots.
As the Bay struggled to make inroads into the Shields penalty area, our entertainment was provided by listening to a couple of Shields fans chatting about such wide-ranging topics such as their involvement in the "Battle of Morrisons" - I was trying to make it look like I was going in to break it up...." Really? The other thing they were chatting about was that someone was standing in front of all the Shields flags that they had lovingly put on the fences behind the grass verge (Curva Nord - apparently) where all the Shields Ultras were gathered. They finished off their "putting the world to rights" session by discussing whether the St George's cross really was a real symbol of the BNP. Things had got that bad!
Deciding to head off to the loo before the half time rush, I glanced over my shoulder as Bainbridge laced an incredible shot into the Whitley net for his hat-trick. I was in denial...I had technically seen no goals so the score was still 0-0. I was happy...?

A brilliant sunset....about the only thing of interest tonight for Whitley Fans!

Even the brilliant sunset faded as the teams re-emerged and Whitley found themselves under the cosh but this time kept the Shields team out. In fact as the half wore on, the home fans seemed to have lost the ability to even applaud their team: the ground was silent. Sing in the library? With their team off to Wembley and still in with a great chance of winning the league, you would have expected more. Long before the end the fans were heading home. Instead of the barrage of noise from the Shields fans we had experienced at Hillheads, the atmosphere had definitely become a damp squib. The game ended 3-0 despite Whitley earning a hatful of corners. Without much quality coming into the box, Shields were able to comfortably see out the final few minutes.
The attendance recorded for the match, although big was nowhere near the 1453 reported but one thing was certain - the public had certainly relished seeing the two teams back together in the same league: billed as El Coastico by the Shields website it hadn't been a happy experience for the Bay fans. Still, there's always another day.... hopefully!

3rd April 2015 - West Allotment Celtic (a)

The rain tipped it down from the minute I emerged from my pit to well after the game had finished but the Boy Mark and I were protected with the use of our Portable Roofs (copyrighted).
There was worry for us both as Mark had only been reminded he was picking me up to make the long trip to Whitley Park 50 minutes before kick off. As we passed the ASDA supermarket at Benton there was concern as the traffic lights and then a roundabout slowed our progress. The clock was ticking and we were stuck in a six-car tailback. Then we managed to get one of the last 15 car park spaces as kickoff approached. More tension followed as we took our place behind 7 or 8 fans...kick off was imminent!
Thankfully we made it and headed down to pitchside carrying our portable roofs. A lot of others had preferred to bring their umbrellas to protect them but ours were the kind of protection that it was okay for the mature football fan to carry.
The team sheet revealed that there was no Andy Farrell and from the start it was noticeable that the midfield lacked a bit of drive. Also missing was Birdie Bird who had outrageously put his family first - preferring to put the birth of his first child before playing at WAC! Ok so he had become a father of a boy (6lb 4oz). But that was at 3:18am! A few hours kip and then off to the game....job's a good'un. It certainly put football in perspective and the good news was that mum and baby were doing well and dad was over the moon. Congratulations too them all.

Battle of the baldies.

Of course without the Birdster, the team seemed even more lacking in attacking guile, despite the stirling work of Kempster and Reid on the wings. The drive of the last two games was missing and this
was annoying the Padster, who kept barking instructions on the touchline. Having listened to various people's views about Atko, I was able to point out recent performances yet as we stood near the dugouts under our manly covers it did seem that there was no praise mixed with the barked instructions. King and Robo were constantly being told to move here, there and everywhere but when they did something good, there was no positivity from the touchline. Therefore the Boy suggested launching one of two new campaigns: #saynicethings and #paddyneedstosmile. Yes sometimes people need instructions but when they do what you want Paddy...how about a thumbs up? Go on, give it a try! In the other dugout , it was nice to see the return of plus fours.





My other new campaign is #whitleyshirtstobeproudof, in aid of getting rid of that bloody awful grey keeper strip and send the rest of the Wembley kits off to Africa please....The shirt was as dismal as the weather.
In the first half Watling should have scored with a close header from a delightful Chris Reid cross while there were a few moments of worry for the grey-clad McCafferty as Celtic's bald headed ram-machine and Sean Reid were causing trouble, especially when a header back to the Whitley keeper from MacDonald looked like it was going to be intercepted but at the last minute the McCafferty managed to grab it. Apart from that heart stopper McDonald was looking the dependable left back we had become used to, as were the rest of the defence.
At half time we met up with Celtic fan, Long Haired Andrew and his son Thomas who joined us on the touchline and updated us on all the Celtic news. The hairy one was delighted when Celtic's Sean Reid directed a "bullet header" into the Whitley net. If nothing else a home win would ensure we could have another local derby (and short trip) the following season. I still wanted a Whitley goal or two to celebrate though and that looked more likely when Dummett brought down Chris Reid for his second booking. After this, Whitley managed to wake up and began pressing more effectively so when the home keeper parried: there was sniffer Watling to score. Whitley now held the sway of the game and missed a number of excellent opportunities.

Craig stretchered off: wishing you a full recovery

Unfortunately the match was to be remembered for a terrible injury to Craig McFarland. As both he and the Celtic player lunged for the ball in front of us we heard a scream and Craig was in trouble. A stretcher soon arrived and he was carried off to be taken to hospital where he was diagnosed with a broken ankle and torn ligaments. A sad end to another amazing season for the highly committed player and our thoughts were on him making a full recovery. A more committed and skillful player you will struggle to find.
After that football hardly mattered and the game finished with 10-a-side, Whitley having used all their subs, and a draw the fairest result.
Next stop Shields and the boys will have to up their games for that one..

24th March 2015 - West Auckland (h)

Will the pot of gold be in Hillheads once more?

It was a low key visit to Hillheads for the visit of West Auckland. Our record against them hadn't been great so when the Boy Mark picked me up we weren't too optimistic. However the performance the previous Saturday suggested we would not be humiliated. There was hope of a new phase beginning for the Once-Mighty-Soon-to-be-Again Bay when a full rainbow could be seen the day before the match above Whitley. It had to be a sign! There was more excitement for the fans entering the ground (well me) as the usual fare of 60s hits blaring out of the musical soul-destroying tannoy had been replaced by eighties hits: namely my favourite Smiths track Big Mouth Strikes Again followed by a more mellower Bob Dylan. It was also nice to see the referee and linesmen had coordinated their hairstyles: all three bald as a coot! Don't try that one Lucy!

Yet again the modest crowd looked just over 200, which was a shame, given the improved form and standard of play. There was a surprise change in goal, with McCafferty replacing Flynn (a response to Saturday's flap-gate?). Also Robinson returned to the starting line-up for the first time since being injured: a reward for his part in a late fightback against Guisborough? Despite the error for the Guisborough winner, Flynn had performed heroics at times to keep the Bay in the game so it looked a bit harsh if that was the reason he found himself on the bench.

Bob and the Boy Mark go crazy after Robo's wonder strike!

The Bay took the game straight to the visitors right from the start and there were the trademark quick passes out of defence and with Birdie and Kempster causing problems on the wings, things were looking good. A shot was cleared off the line and the West keeper had to be on his metal to keep a number of great shots out. There was joy amongst the 255 crowd when Robo made a nifty turn before spectacularly finding the top corner of the net! The Whitley workrate was phenomenal but it was hard to see how they could keep that up in the second half. Also hard to fathom was the new craze that was beginning to appear at Hillheads of men wearing shorts in the cold evening. These were not athletes who had just popped in on the way home from their run, practice or match. No! These were deliberate attempts to pretend that Summer was here and could only end in hypothermia and manflu! Never mind the fact that they were, on the whole, the most horrendous collection of faded 70s fashion wear. No! Men of Whitley don't be tempted again! Not even if it is Summer: not with those legs!

Take it like a man and
drink your bovril!

As if to prove their disapproval of the whole fashion shorts situation West scored. The ball was slotted through to their number nine, Matthew Moffat, to score against the run of play. Please not a Guisborough repeat show we cried at half time.
It was cold comfort that our brave group had avoided the shorts rebellion by wearing multiple layers as we supped our purchases from Tommy's Tavern. We were still freezing and West had been let back into the match. We were joined for the second half by Newly Neal, who I hadn't seen since our excursion to Blyth: hopefully a last minute opposition goal wouldn't by signalled by his arrival.
The second half looked ominous as West pushed forward with renewed energy but Whitley held firm and soaked up the pressure. McBride could have put us back into the lead when Robo played him in but his effort flashed over. It was at this point that the need for a new set of strips became obvious as Bob pointed out the size of Birdie's shorts in relation to the rest of his body. The drag factor alone was enough to stop him scoring and a new set of strips would mean an end to the legacy hanging over the club since visiting Wembley: four long years ago!
Food for the Big Coat Crew there?

And Farrell scores!

West were now turning up the screw and it was all hands to the pump for the Bay. However when we needed a hero, up stepped the Bald Bandido, Farrell: still not sporting a moustache. The hairless wonder took a pass from Robo on the edge of the West box before launching a sublime effort into the top corner (yes again) and in so doing avoided the outstretched hand of the West keeper Lowson: a bit too Low he was. (sorry best I can do).
This was still plenty of heart-in-mouth stuff, including McCafferty clearing the ball straight at a visiting striker without him capitalising but Andy Farrell personified the new spirit with his tackling and was rewarded with a friendly punch from a blue striped shirt after typically battling to retain the ball deep into injury time.
 The final whistle was welcomed and there was a warm fuzzy feeling around NE25 as the Paddy revolution gained momentum!
Getting home and tucked up in bed reading the programme with a cup of hot chocolate and a slice of cake, it was sad to read that the loyal face of Whitley David Hall would not be a feature of any more Bay games as he is moving to Malta. A big fan of everything Whitley and not a fan of my own past with Newcastle's Ice Hockey scene, it is sad to see such a loyal fan leaving. It must have been a good way to end his supporting career. He bid everyone farewell standing by the car park gate and I am sure we all wish  him a safe journey and good luck in his new life: it will certainly be warmer!

Well done Shields....

Well done North Shields for reaching the 2015 FA Vase final.....

.....there done it, but it hurt.

21st March - Guisborough Town

Bouyant boy!

The Paddy revolution had stalled slightly when the lads lost 3-2 at Morpeth. Today was another challenge for the Bay when second placed Guisborough arrived. The competition from the Big Toon people meant the crowd was down but 228 people still turned up and I was in a buoyant mood on the way to Hillheads. Things were on the up, I felt. Even better, the boys had managed to win the away game 2-1 in October. so a revitalised Whitley stood a great chance of getting a result at home. A quick check of the programme informed us that there would not be many bookings as we had our favourite, tolerant referess (thanks for that Paul Statto) Lucy May: who often preferred a good talking to: a little too often, maybe?
The first fifteen minutes of the game it looked like the Bay were the top two side and not the other way. With Andy Ferrell and new arrival (another? )Jake Richardson  marshalling the midfield and Blandford and Laws looking solid in defence we were sure this was to be our day. At this point the Boy Mark arrived, having just finished buying a new washer and tumble dryer....white ones apparently: nice! Watling and Bird had gelled up front and when Watters was put through on goal, he slotted majestically past the visiting keeper. Cue celebrations!

Go on... book someone Lucy for
breaking Alex's nose...

Not long after though there was drama as Kempster, who had been causing no end of problems received a blow to the face and had to receive treatment. He was soon substituted with a suspected broken nose, to be replaced by Mrs Norris's son: Sam. This seemed to blunt the Bay attack and Guisborough equalised from a great cross and header with half time approaching.

Moira - so incensed she decides to
 invade the pitch, slightly.

The second half started and I was showing more interest in my marvellous cup of tea purchased from Tommy's Tiny Tea Tavern when Guisborough were ahead. Apparently, the impressive Flynn had been caught in two minds. Catch? Punch? I'll wave at it instead he decided and we were behind. From this point on Guisborough did their best to slow things down and I earned  disapproval from the blue-coated Whitley Elders by telling him to "Get on with it!" No swearing, no derogatory terms...but not accepted Bay Behaviour, apparently!  People get a bit cross, especially when someone dressed as a radioactive lemon takes forever to release the ball...how about a card Lucy? No, best just encourage them to go a bit faster....of course... good idea.

Take your time lemon head!

After that the game drifted a bit as Whitley mounted occasional attacks with some great play but the final ball just wasn't there. As Town packed their defence, Paddy decided it was time to introduce Robo for his first appearance since....a long time: time for a Robo pinpoint pass!

The loyal Bellenders!

Guisborough still looked dangerous on the break and Flynn had to be on his toes to spectacularly save on a number of occasions and more than made up for his earlier error: including a spectacular 1 on 1 effort, saved with his feet.
It was also good to see the return of the Bay bell - chiming each attack: a little throwback to the good old days and sorely missed when it isn't there!
With the arrival of Robo, it was also a chance to judge the increasingly competitive Bay Beard competition with Craig Mc still leading the way in both bushiness and style...of course it would be great to see the fiercely competitive Andy Ferrell join in the competition and so become the Bay's own Tim Howard...just a thought but the competition is still running so keep those beards growing!

The final word almost belonged to the bearded maestro McFarlane when he exchanged passes with Robbie the Birdman and his effort was just deflected over the bar and onto the top of the net.
There was even time for a fracas of handbags towards the end, after which Lucy decided to pull out the cards: no wonder she finished the game soon after: obviously needed a lie down!

 A valiant effort but it was not to be. However we had played the team with the best away record in the league and been unlucky. There had been fight, determination and good football so things look extremely positive. The Paddy revolution rolls on!

Craig does the Matrix

Energetic lino

Birdie on the ball!

Beard envy from the boy Mark?