19th November 2016 - Penrith (h)

The three Musketeers had passed their first test in permanent charge with flying second half colours so hopes were high against a Penrith side that had only lost one of its previous away games. But the lads would have to do without the in-form General Patton. On the plus side Professor Row Z (if we had one) Wilkinson was back to join the solid Ryan Keltie and improving Callum Anderson and flying Supermac in defence.
We were not happy when our comfortable spot in the Allotment End sunshine was ripped from our grasp by Penrith winning the toss...all because they didn't want their keeper staring into the sun! Didn't they know I needed the warmth of the sun to beat the man-flu ripping dramatically through my body? I vented, in a banterous manner, my spleen at the linesman as we tracked our way into the other end's shade.
The football in the opening stages wasn't much to get excited about but we soon realised that Penrith's 'tallest keeper in the league' nominee was going to be entertaining. Step forward Jonnie Jamieson...you were officially the funniest player on the pitch! His banter kept us going throughout the afternoon and he didn't even care if no-one was listening.
"We're only here for the fun!" was his first offering when a visiting chance went begging.
It soon became apparent that Penrith were going to make a real game of it and thankfully the Kempstervator was on hand to head off the line when Flynn found himself stranded. When an unknown Penrith midfielder fell over in the middle of the pitch, Jonnie was in stitches but with half time approaching, the game was turned on its head. Completely against the run of play the Bay were ahead: Robbo firing through a sea of bodies. Jonnie didn't hold back on his team.
There was a shock start to the second half as a mis-timed Bay tackle saw the visitors awarded a penalty. Up stepped Martyn Coleman and Flynn bailed out his team with a save low to his left. Jonnie commented:

Ploughed? Blame the frost and the rain!

"We would have a half-decent team if we had a forward." We lapped it up.
Next up on the catalogue of missed visiting chances was Andrew Murray-Jones, who managed to miss a virtually open goal. In their defence, the pitch was not helping. In an attempt to do something to improve it from Tuesday night (cut it I think) the Hillheads ground staff had ploughed it slightly...I'm blaming the hard frost the previous night...and the rain.
Another Penrith chance went begging to which our resident comedian remarked:

The noise was so great that it attracted Baby Twitter
 to investigate and pick up blades of grass for people.

"Can't hit a cow's arse with a banjo." which seemed a strange expression to us seasiders and maybe is more common in the rolling hills of the Lake District where cow-bashing is more commonplace.
To be fair to the Penrith forwards, they were doing everything but score: it just wouldn't go in, thankfully. Tommo was in inspired form and a spectacular overhead kick from Bobby Atkinson saw our young keeper tip over in an equally dramatic fashion.
"Cheated every week!" railed JJ.
Captain Supermac still managed to lead a breakaway charge and his effort was tipped over by Jonnie J. Next up it was Robbo, who was unlucky to flagged offside when he scored.
"Cheated every week!" we informed JJ.

The last act of the game was played out in true ice hockey fashion. With Penrith awarded a corner, up popped our favourite! JJ was going to show the strikers 'how to do it' . The corner came in, was missed by all the visiting players and was cleared up the field to the marauding Kyle Patton. Still with plenty to do, he managed to beat a Penrith defender to the ball then racde in on goal. Still with plenty to do he coolly rolled it past a final desperate defender into the empty net. We got quite excited. JJ not so.

A fantastic end to an exciting game. The lads had dug deep and come up trumps. The Bay were in the lofty heights of 5th! Tommo: the Flynnster was rightly named GBOM. Good Boy!

15th November 2016 - Bedlington Terriers (h) BMM League Cup -2

Marc Nash was the boss permanently with Anthony Woodhouse and Chris Moore as his assistant and coach respectively. What an opportune time for Paddy Atkinson to bring his greatly improved Terriers team to the Bay. Paddy, Mr Angrypants, wasn't all bad apparently since, I was informed, he had paid for tracksuits for the team when he arrived at the Bay. What a nice man...he's gone up in my estimation then.

Old school Justin Bieber....?

Still without the Shankster, who was watching on, it was the same team as Saturday's win but with Callum Anderson coming in for Professor Wilkinson. Callum had certainly changed the game along with Kyle Patton when they had come on in Washington so it was good to see him getting a start. Keltie and Allen were working well together in midfield and it was the Bay who started the strongest. Twice Kyle Fryatt jinked his way towards goal. the first time he ended with a trickling shot and the second, he ended up flying perfectly through the air to land in an undignified heap. Then it was Robo's turn to get a good chance but the chance was missed when he should have taken a shot first time.
It was nice to see our favourite Pixie in goal: ex WAC keeper, Jak Wells but this time he arrived complete with a new haircut. Gone were the flowing grungy locks to be replaced by an old school Justin Bieber look. Next time we see him...the skinhead?
The Bay were playing some great stuff but Flynn still needed to be on his toes when the Terriers' Kyle Oliver hit a shot that screamed past his left hand post. Next it was the Kempstervator who found Justin Bieber's legs too tricky to nutmeg.
The lino was doing his best to help out the Terriers when he informed their left back how poorly he was doing in playing our forwards offside. "Unfair!" we cried.
Finally, a fantastic cross from Callum Munroe was met by Robbo's bullet header. Justin was not happy!
We were delighted to welcome back a fit again Tommy at the Tea Emporium after a period out of the kitchen through illness. Boy, can that man make tea.....and errrr, hot chocolate.
The Padster had obviously had a quiet word with his team as the visitors took control of the second half. Another great fingertip save from Flynn kept the visitors out, then it was a lobbed effort from the half way line that had Tommy boy backpedalling. Thankfully it just drifted over.
Whitley's luck ran out when the Terrier's Paul Wardle left Flynn grasping air as he headed home.
Back came the Bay, however, and it was the General who met a magical cross from the wing wizard Potter with a volley over his shoulder.

There was more delight as the Kempstervator headed home, allegedly with his eyes shut, on his 150th Bay appearance. He was pleased with that!

Next, it was Supermac with a screamer from outside the box that the Bieber-like had no chance with. We were then in heaven when Robbo attempted a perfect reverse-flick-cross-type-thing that landed in the visiting crooner's relieved hands. Moira, just returned from her holiday in South Africa...we've seen the photos...then told him to watch his language and just "Try to Laugh it off." Jak just looked at her and replied "Do I look like I can just laugh it off?" with a cheeky smile before launching into a rendition of "No Pressure" from his 2015 album Purpose.

Push it! Push it real good!

Isn't Google wonderful.
As the goals dried up for a while, we contented ourselves by singing Spinderella and Salt and Peppa's "Push It" before we were sent into our final moment of ecstasy for the evening...A wonder-strike from youngster Jack Cooper!
1-2
1-2-3
1-2-3-4
5-1
Could have been the chant....but instead we admired the new Aldi on driving out the Car Park. We were still in a cup!

12th November 2016 - Washington (a)

Not Washington DC but Washington SR!

My first opportunity, due to family commitments, to see the Nashville revolution that was taking place at
the Bay meant I had to visit the new home of newly-elected president Donald 'build-a-wall' Trump. I was slightly bemused when The Boy Mark arranged to pick me up only an hour before kick-off and that there wasn't a trans-Atlantic trip but a trans-Tyne one. Yes, I was slightly disappointed when we turned up, after ending up in one of Nissan's numerous deadends, at the Sports and Leisure Complex. This was made up for as we relaxed in their sumptuous bar area that overlooked the pitch.
With a win and a draw in the two games since taking over from Chan, the Nashster was doing himself no harm with potential manager interviews being held next week. Of course I wonder which of the questions below will the candidates be asked first and has Marc been asked them already?
"Can you work miracles on a shoe-string?"
"Can you work on water or perform neat tricks with loaves and fishes?"
"Do you have a rich millionaire wife (or husband - don't want to be sexist of course) willing to plough loads of money into our club?"

Mo-time in Washington!

All Marc could do was win games and hope he had a chance. For today's game, the lads were without the watching Shanksy who, despite sporting a trendy little moustache for Movember was injured for the game thanks to a not-so-tasty tackle in the win at West Auckland.
In his absence the front two pairing seemed to be General Callum Patton and Robbo with the Kempstervator and Kyle Fry on the wings.
After a minute's silence for Remembrance Day, it soon became clear that this was going to become a backs-to-the wall job as the home side pressed forward. There were rare forays for the visiting attack with most of them coming through Tom 'Harry' Potter's magical runs down the Bay's right wing.
Against the run of play, it was General Patton who put the Bay ahead with a superb 25-yard freekick that left one of our favourite keepers, Dale Connor, grasping thin air.

It could have been even better for the Bay as more Potter wizardry ended up with the Fryboy frying flying in at the far post but his slide only sent the ball past the far post.
Connor had avoided all contact with the Bay hordes behind the goal (all ten of us) but his afternoon was sealed when he leapt like a salmon to collect a cross on the edge of his area and his captain shouted "Good boy!" to him. We rubbed our hands with glee.

Canny spot for windmills and spotting Penshaw Monument!

Mmmmmm.....canny table cloth and refreshment selection, although the gravy was a bit thin!

Throughout the second half, on the rare occasions Whitley threatened his goal, he was subjected to a chorus of "Good boy!", "Bad boy!" and "Good boy, fetch the ball!" How funny we thought we were!

Wild boys! Wild boys!
(but I really tried to get a shot of the flock of
starlings swarming - I think it is called a murmur...)

Our own Professor Wilkinson was definitely a "Bad boy!" when he directed a simple pass straight to a home defender. Thankfully his team-mates helped him out. In fact Flynn, in the Bay goal was having a confident game and his handling of crosses was especially noteworthy.
Unfortunately, the Bay's luck ran out when the ball pinged about Flynn's penalty area, twice it was cleared off the line before ex-Bay boy Paul Kane slipped the ball home. Bad Boy!
Flynn came to the Bay's rescue with a tip-over to stop the Washington Redskins  FC from taking the lead. With the young Corporal Kyle Patton and Callum Anderson on for the Bay, we actually saw some Bay attacking play. In injury time the away fans went wild for a penalty when not only Alex Kempster ended up on the ground but also the ever-dependable Professor Wilko. Would you believe the Washington Capitols  FC defenders accused the Prof of diving, however the big man took no notice and the General stepped up to lash past Connor to earn himself a big round of "Good Boy"s. He fully deserved his GBOTM award at the end!

Is this the last resting place of the original good boy?
Nope - electric main in the corner of the pitch .
#healthandsafetynightmare!