19th November 2016 - Penrith (h)

The three Musketeers had passed their first test in permanent charge with flying second half colours so hopes were high against a Penrith side that had only lost one of its previous away games. But the lads would have to do without the in-form General Patton. On the plus side Professor Row Z (if we had one) Wilkinson was back to join the solid Ryan Keltie and improving Callum Anderson and flying Supermac in defence.
We were not happy when our comfortable spot in the Allotment End sunshine was ripped from our grasp by Penrith winning the toss...all because they didn't want their keeper staring into the sun! Didn't they know I needed the warmth of the sun to beat the man-flu ripping dramatically through my body? I vented, in a banterous manner, my spleen at the linesman as we tracked our way into the other end's shade.
The football in the opening stages wasn't much to get excited about but we soon realised that Penrith's 'tallest keeper in the league' nominee was going to be entertaining. Step forward Jonnie Jamieson...you were officially the funniest player on the pitch! His banter kept us going throughout the afternoon and he didn't even care if no-one was listening.
"We're only here for the fun!" was his first offering when a visiting chance went begging.
It soon became apparent that Penrith were going to make a real game of it and thankfully the Kempstervator was on hand to head off the line when Flynn found himself stranded. When an unknown Penrith midfielder fell over in the middle of the pitch, Jonnie was in stitches but with half time approaching, the game was turned on its head. Completely against the run of play the Bay were ahead: Robbo firing through a sea of bodies. Jonnie didn't hold back on his team.
There was a shock start to the second half as a mis-timed Bay tackle saw the visitors awarded a penalty. Up stepped Martyn Coleman and Flynn bailed out his team with a save low to his left. Jonnie commented:

Ploughed? Blame the frost and the rain!

"We would have a half-decent team if we had a forward." We lapped it up.
Next up on the catalogue of missed visiting chances was Andrew Murray-Jones, who managed to miss a virtually open goal. In their defence, the pitch was not helping. In an attempt to do something to improve it from Tuesday night (cut it I think) the Hillheads ground staff had ploughed it slightly...I'm blaming the hard frost the previous night...and the rain.
Another Penrith chance went begging to which our resident comedian remarked:

The noise was so great that it attracted Baby Twitter
 to investigate and pick up blades of grass for people.

"Can't hit a cow's arse with a banjo." which seemed a strange expression to us seasiders and maybe is more common in the rolling hills of the Lake District where cow-bashing is more commonplace.
To be fair to the Penrith forwards, they were doing everything but score: it just wouldn't go in, thankfully. Tommo was in inspired form and a spectacular overhead kick from Bobby Atkinson saw our young keeper tip over in an equally dramatic fashion.
"Cheated every week!" railed JJ.
Captain Supermac still managed to lead a breakaway charge and his effort was tipped over by Jonnie J. Next up it was Robbo, who was unlucky to flagged offside when he scored.
"Cheated every week!" we informed JJ.

The last act of the game was played out in true ice hockey fashion. With Penrith awarded a corner, up popped our favourite! JJ was going to show the strikers 'how to do it' . The corner came in, was missed by all the visiting players and was cleared up the field to the marauding Kyle Patton. Still with plenty to do, he managed to beat a Penrith defender to the ball then racde in on goal. Still with plenty to do he coolly rolled it past a final desperate defender into the empty net. We got quite excited. JJ not so.

A fantastic end to an exciting game. The lads had dug deep and come up trumps. The Bay were in the lofty heights of 5th! Tommo: the Flynnster was rightly named GBOM. Good Boy!