Sunday 15 October 2017

Tuesdays 3rd and 10th October - Washington and Ryhope CW (H)



A Tale of Two Tuesdays

Our tales are in stark contrast but could have ended up the same way, if not worse! They both started with a similar standard of Bay play but luck played its merry dance in different ways.

Washington

We begin our first, a sorry tale, on an average Tuesday night in a little town on the northeast coast. Twas a crispy, chilly evening and a lonely French Tricoleur billowed in the wind that whipped about the hardened locals who had come to witness the might of the Bay take on their lowly visitors from Washingtonshire.
These brave souls however were, 47 seconds into the game, shocked by former Knight of the Bay Robbie Williams-on reneging on his promise to 'offer protection' (gratifications Kinnon), as he put the lowly visitors 1-0 up. Unfortunately, your lowly storyteller was too busy admiring the piles of crisp autumn leaves to spot the action so I can offer no more tragic details beyond the stark facts: the Bay were losing 1-0.
The tale for the next 90 minutes was to be one of unrequited love and revenge. The visiting goalkeeper, Dan Gladstone was returning to the club where he was almost always the goalkeeping bridesmaid. For the next 90 minutes, he pounced, stretched and leaped to keep out the Whitley attacks; frustrating the home faithful.
Those self-same faithful sought solace in sustenance and thus was born: PIE CLUB!
The first rule of PIE CLUB is: don't talk about PIE CLUB!
The second rule of PIE CLUB is: Kinnon gets them.
Thus the faithful devoted themselves to their pies and chips (with gravy of course) as the traitorous Gladstone performed his dastardly best. Their strength gradually sapped away until the closing minutes when the chink in Gladstone's armour was finally exploited.
A snatched shot from Sir Aidan of Haley whipped through a crowd of defending knights and The Gladstone saw the blow late. He managed to palm it away only for Sir Scott 'the Wasp' Jasper to slide in to score.

The faithful cheered their brave combatants on but The Gladstone was not to be breached twice. A draw the honourable result!
The sad remains from PIE CLUB!
On the way back to my mud hovel, I was honoured to meet Sir Baldie of the Bruce who offered his one rule for PIE CLUB: thick crusts! Who was I to argue?

Ryhope CW

Our second tale is one of glorious victory after unprecedented trials and tribulations. The Bay had been denied two of their most formidable warriors: Tom of the Flynn and the Gaelic Giant Thibault of Paris. Both had been wounded in the proud 2-0 victory over the Seaham clan. Their wounds were to deprive the Bay of their heroes for many weeks. The faithful were worried. From over the waters rode the noble Sir Dan the Lister to aid our cause. We had called and he had answered: hoorah!
On arrival, there was the sight of one of the Ryhopian warriors complete in his playing regalia stocking up on supplies at the local burger hostelry. Whether he was stocking up on carbohydrates or trying to join PIE CLUB was not our place to guess but we hoped that it would slow down his team.
However, instead those who had climbed or descended the big Hillheads grew more and more fearful as Sir Dan was called upon to perform his acrobatics time after time.
With just over half an hour gone, the visiting warriors made the mistake of beating Sir Dan only to hit the bar. This simple act awoke the raging beast that was Sir Peter Glen of Ravenhill. He had had enough and when the ball was headed across goal, Sir Peter roared that it was his and slammed home from 15 English yards. The relief around the playing arena was palpable!

The Bay beast was suddenly roaring! A few minutes later the Bay peasants were cheering their heroes again when Sir Kyle of the Patton curled a shot goalwards only for it to be directed into the net by a hapless defender. 


 At the interval, the good people of the Bay were able to refresh themselves with their chest puffed up by the two strikes that had been completely against the run of play!
Oi! Peasants! Buy our tasty tomato soup!
The Bay's rich merchants peddle their wares!
Into the second passage of play and Sir Peter-Glen of Ravenhill was still raging and it was he who put the goal count to 3-0 with the Merlin-like Potter crossing for Sir Peter to slot home.
Soon after the visiting dastardly Daniel Lay of Ryhopeshire laid out Sir Jasper with an atrocious tackle that forced him to sadly retire to the medical tent. Dastardly Dan, for his part, sought forgiveness in the local monastery.
The extra man advantage allowed the Bay to go nap. First Sir Kyle of the Patton backhealed into the visiting net...

 ...then it was Liam of the Brooks' turn to meet a delightful chip from superiorsub Sir Matthew of the Cornish: 5-0.

There was more wondrous skill from the south-western man as the Cornish jinked his way past keeper and defenders. Unfortunately, his shot bounced off the post. Thankfully man of the moment Sir Peter slid bravely in to score! He would be able to quoff his hat in public after that three-goal trick!

6-0!
If you had asked the visiting goal defender, Johnny Ball to 'think of a number' of goals he'd concede,  he certainly wouldn't have chosen seven but that was exactly what happened. Matty of the Cornish thrilled the peasants once more before blasting home the final goal.
The mood leaving the ground was in complete contrast to that of the previous week: it certainly had been a Tale of Two Tuesdays!
NB: I wish to forget the following match at home to West Auckland so the next blog will be direct from the TEAM BUS as I journey the 44+ a little bit to Westella and Willerby! Very excited. #HawaytheBay!




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